Footprints in the Sand

Being Thankful

Psalm 100
Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.
Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
Know ye that the Lord he is God: and it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise; be thankful unto him, and bless his name.
For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.

We had our Community-wide Thanksgiving Service at church last night and this was the scripture that was read and preached. It was a great service! It is always my favorite service of the year. The singing is amazing, the atmosphere even better. Our regular Offerman Baptist Church people are there and we invite the Church of God and Evergreen. Evergreen is a "black" church and let me tell you - they know how to worship! I enjoy having them in this service every year. Actually, the entire congregation was upbeat last night and very receptive to the Word that was read. The preacher did an an awesome job of encouraging and speaking the truth.

We sang a song recently that spoke to my heart. It is called "Blessed Be Your Name." Hear it here. It says "Every blessing you pour out I'll turn back to praise. When the darkness closes in Lord, still I will say, Blessed be the name of the Lord, blessed be your name.
You give and take away, you give and take away, my heart will choose to say Lord blessed be your name."

The last part is hard for me because I've had something taken away from me this year.

But I choose to say.......Lord, blessed be your name!

I am thankful to God for so many things. I am thankful for my salvation, my husband, my children, my parents, my church, my job, my friends.

I want to wish each of you a special and Happy Thanksgiving! I am thinking of you on this day and my heart is thankful for YOU!

Remember to take time to thank God for your blessings.

Miscarriage

This has been the hardest few months of my life, for several reasons. But most recently is the loss of my 4th child. It happened on Sept 21. It has left me with so much confusion and so many unanswered questions. Why? Why? I've been angry, sad. It has been very hard to deal with and there are still days that I don't know what to do.

I have so many blessings in my life that you just don't know. I am so thankful for everything God has blessed me with. But now this....I don't know why I got pregnant in the first place (I was on the birth control pill), I don't know why I didn't feel right from the beginning, I don't know why I had to lose this baby......I'm so sad. I was supposed to be 11 weeks pregnant and I went for my checkup. It had been a month since my previous checkup and I did not feel right. I have been stressed, worried, you name it. I never publicly announced my pregnancy because deep down I had "that" feeling.

Nathan has been my rock through all of this. It is simply amazing the kind of man that God has molded him into. He was with me the day of my appointment. I silently prayed for everything to be okay, but I "knew" it wasn't going to be. The dr. did not hear a heartbeat with her machine, so she sent me in for a sonogram. Once the sonogram popped up on the screen........I hate to even remember.......I immediately knew that life was no longer in me. There was nothing. No movement. No heartbeat. Just an empty, gray sonogram. I lost the baby at home the next morning. I eventually went in for a dnc that afternoon.

I've cried so much since that day. There are only a few of you who even knew I was pregnant, but I've learned that so many more people knew too. My parents were so excited and they spread the word. But now it's like, "go back and spread this bad news". I can't stand it. There are so many people that knew about my pregnancy just from hearing it from someone else. But now it's over.

I'm so sorry for any woman who has ever experienced this. It is just heart-beaking and dark. It is hard to get over. Especially hard for me because i have had three healthy, beautiful babies. I never thought that this would happen to me.

I'm so glad Nathan has been there for me. And my parents. And my church family. I've received cards, phone calls, texts, emails of encouragement. It really helps. It is just so hard to go through.

Natalee gave me a Bible a few months ago and it is the ESV translation, and I have read a passage over and over again and it brings me comfort:
Romans 5: Peace with God through Faith
It reads:
Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

I know that i will eventually feel better one day. For now, I am thanking God for my many blessings.

What I've been reading

If you have a child, then you have probably read the "What to Expect" books. They have been a lifesaver to me. They have answered many questions and have helped me understand exactly what it is that my body is going through! I feel like they have helped me be a better mom too.

I learned so much from the books when I had Natalee. Now, I did call my mom an awful lot, but not as much as I would have if I did not have these books. I re-read them when I had Trent. Then, again when I had Ryan.

Ryan is 10 months old so I've been reading the book "What to Expect The First Year".



Well, life is crazy around here, so I've only read it up to the ninth month. Surely he's missing out on something because I haven't read about it yet!! For example, I know he should be eating more table food than he is, but I still give him baby food. Actually, he just started getting all of his teeth, so I think he's getting ready for the "real" stuff now. I gave him mashed potatoes from the table tonight and he loved them.

I like these books because they help me to know what to "Expect." I am a planner. I like to know what is going to happen, when it is going to happen, and where it is going to happen.

God has been gracious enough to let me plan most of my life just how I wanted it. But, he sees the need every now and then to jump in there and say, "This is how I want it, Becky. You're going to do this my way."

So, I'm dusting off my copy of this book and I will be reading it all over again for the fourth time:



If you are smart enough to realize what I just wrote, then you know what is going on with me right now!!

My favorite picture of 2010

It was Christmas Day.



For us, Christmas Day is a day of relaxing and enjoying time with the family. We do not have to rush here or there. We have no obligations. We sleep as late as possible until the first kid gets up - this is usually Trent. After he gets up, I go ahead and get up Natalee because I want them to be able to look at their presents together. The past few years, I have tried hard to not "over-do" Christmas with all of the presents and stuff. I try to keep it as simple as possible. Yes, the kids get presents. I do not have a certain amount of presents that each kid gets nor do I spend a certain amount of money on each kid. Nathan and I shop together and come up with some special gifts that we think each kid will love.

This past Christmas was very special. I felt so blessed. Ryan was two months old and I could not have asked for a better baby. He has been a good sleeper, eater, everything since the beginning. Trent is such a sweet boy and he loves his baby brother so much. Natalee has always been a good girl and has a funny side to her personality. All of them are such a joy to be around.

I remember the night of my favorite picture. It had been a long, Christmas day. We spent most of the day at home. I'm sure we ventured out at some point, but what mattered most to me is that we were together.

At the end of the day, I went to feed Ryan in his room. As I sat in his rocking chair feeding him his bottle, Natalee and Trent brought their cups into the room and sat them on the table. They began to play in the floor - laughing and giggling and putting on a show, which is one of their favorite things to do together. As I sat there laughing at them, I looked over to the table to see what time it was. 10:15 pm.

That is when I saw something else. I saw just how incredibly blessed I am. I saw a green sippy cup, a pink cup with flowers, and an empty bottle. These things belonged to my children. My children. Natalee, Trent, and Ryan. My healthy children. Silly children. Happy children. Good children.

My heart was overwhelmed at that very moment. God has blessed me beyond my wildest dreams with three children and I've never done anything to deserve any of this. Each one of my children is special to me and I love them with all of my heart.

Surgery Update

Just before surgery this morning.....



Watching cartoons just before surgery....


Trent's surgery went amazingly well. The Dr. said everything looked perfect and went as planned. After surgery, Trent woke up and ate a popsicle, drank Sprite, and began talking with us. He even joked a little!

We took him to Kmart to get a prize and he chose a game for his Leapster. He also liked some flipflops too, so we bought them. We went to eat at Western Sizzlin and he had two bowls of icecream, one strawberry and one vanilla. He didn't want any jello - said he didn't like jello. Uh-oh. He should be fine though. We bought plenty of icecream.

We are home now and he is resting in his bed. Please continue to remember him as he recovers - he isn't taking to the pain medication too kindly. He is having some side effects. Hopefully it will be temporary. If it continues, the Dr. said to just give him Tylenol for pain.

The nurse told us several times how cute Trent is - she said he's a "pretty" boy. It's funny, but he is. I know "pretty" isn't exactly a word to describe a boy, but it fits. She said he has the cutest, most perfect little lips. She was amazed that he never cried. He never cried before or after surgery. She gave him a ride in her big red wagon when it was time to go home. He enjoyed it.

We are thankful to be home now and resting. This little fella is gonna be just fine!

This is in recovery...



The wagon ride...

Surgery

By the time you read this, maybe the surgery will be over and done with and there will be good news to report.

Trent's surgery will be at 7:45 am on Tuesday morning. We are supposed to be there by 6 am.

I have good expectations so far, but the closer it gets, the more nervous I get! They are putting my baby to sleep.....and that scares me a little. I would rather it be me than him. But, this has to be done in hopes that he will no longer get strep throat like he did last year.

Send up a prayer for my little Trent would you?

He Loves Me

I'm talking about Trent. He shows it in different ways. Like one night this week, we were sitting on the couch and he somehow snuggled his way into my lap. I didn't mention anything about the fact that my soon to be 4-year-old was sitting in my lap. We just kept on talking like normal and I sure was enjoying every minute of it.

Trent is a lot like me. If he loves you, he is going to tell you he doesn't. If he wants to compliment you, he will say something mean instead and then give you that shy little sneaky grin. You have to about bribe him for a hug. I remember a friend of mine once saying "Becky doesn't give hugs." Well, I used not to. They made me uncomfortable. But after graduating high school, I've given a lot more than I ever thought I would because I realized just how important my friends and family were to me. Trent is the same way.

If I catch him being sweet to me and loving on me, I might say "you love me don't ya?" His response, "no I don't" followed by the sweetest smile you have ever seen.

The funniest thing to me is how he shows his love to the people at church. I can't tell you how many times I have heard a woman holler "ouch!", but it happens pretty often. To show his love to the women at church, Trent just casually walks by them and "whops" them on the tail! Yes, he really does. So many women have asked me why he does that. It is obvious to me - he is showing his love. I've told them over and over...if Trent hits you on the tail, then it means he loves you.

Today we had a special day - just me and Trent. I took him to the hospital to do paperwork for his surgery next week. He will be getting his tonsils removed on Tuesday. He was a good boy the entire time. The nurse asked us both questions and he would use his manners each time. He said "yes 'mam" and "thank you". For using his manners, the nurse rewarded him with a book. She was impressed and it just made me smile inside to know that he was being such a good boy.

Trent and I ate lunch together too. I asked him what he wanted and his response...spaghetti. So, we went to Rockin Bear. He got spaghetti and I got a bbq. After that, we went home and napped together. But, our time wasn't over yet. We picked up Natalee from school and while she was at gymnastics for two hours, we went to the park. That's where Trent made me the happiest....

We got out of the car at the park and Trent grabbed my hand. We walked hand in hand toward the swings. Halfway there, I scooped him up and gave him some sugar and told him I loved him. We played on the swings a while and then he was ready to slide. I bent down to talk to him and he caught me by surprise....he just threw his arms around my neck and gave me the biggest hug.....and then he kissed me on the cheek! I had the biggest grin!

My heart is so full of love for this little boy. I'm so thankful to be his "mama".

Trent's Dr. Visits

I'm thinking about my little Trent tonight. He's got to go to the Doctor tomorrow. He will be having his tonsils out soon and the doctor wants to do a test on his ears to make sure he may/may not need tubes also. Of course, I'm hoping that he doesn't need tubes, but I just want what is best for him.

For some reason, Trent has had Strep Throat constantly for the past year. Yes....constantly. We did not realize it until Nov 2010. Sure, it seemed like every time we turned around that he was getting diagnosed with strep again, but none of us stopped and actually counted up the times.

Turns out that Trent was treated for strep about 7 times in 2010. What is puzzling, though, is that he does not have the classic symptoms. Yes, he occasionally gets the fever with it....but not every time. The only thing we've noticed is that he will lose his appetite when it "flares" up.

He is not contagious. No one in our family is contracting it from him...... no one at daycare is getting it. It's just a weird thing.

We took him to the doctor in Nov and told him, "Doc, it seems like he gets this an awful lot." He looked in Trent's files and it was like every other month!

What has happened is that Trent will lose his appetite (or possibly run a fever), we take him to the Doctor, the Doctor tests him positive for strep, antibiotics are prescribed, Trent takes all of the nasty medicine, and we then think that everything is fine. Come to find out, the medicine never fully worked! Sure, he would feel better and we would think he was fine. We never thought to take him back to the Doctor and test to see if the medicine worked!

Poor baby has basically had Strep Throat for at least the entire year of 2010 and we did not realize it!

Well, now that we know what has been going on, he has seen a specialist. Looks like he is going to have his tonsils and adnoids taken out. First the doctor wants to make sure that his ears check out and he doesn't have fluid buildup or anything.

Would you say a little prayer for Trent? He goes for his ear test on Monday and then we will be scheduling his surgery soon. He's been a happy boy through all of this. He even has his appetite now and says he feels fine. Poor baby still has strep throat though, and he needs some prayers from us all.

Comforted

My work schedule is pretty good. The best days are T/R when I work from 9 am to noon. Love those days!

However, I work long hours on M/W. I am at work between 9:30 am to 7 pm. I have a class between 11 and 12:30. Then another class between 5:30 to 7pm. The other hours in between are my Office Hours in which I must schedule to do work in my office - stuff like grade papers, meet with students, etc. I get a lot done on these days.

I love my job, but there are times when things get stressful. This week was one of them. Monday morning. It all began. It was a long day for me on Monday. I had a lot to do. Students are getting stressed because due dates are approaching....they have tests to take....and all the other things that we all remember as a college student. Well, believe it or not, the teachers feel the stress too.

I had great classes on Monday, but I was very ready to get home. Nathan has the responsibility of the kids all by himself on Mondays. He is quite capable, but I still worry about not being able to be home until 7:30 or 8 pm. By the way, he did an awesome job this Monday. He had the kids bathed and had a yummy pot of homemade soup waiting on the stove when I got home.

Still, I was stressed as I left work and headed home. I wanted to be able to blink....and then be home immediately. I rushed to my office after class, gathered my purse, and headed to my car as fast as possible. As I left the College, I had to stop at the red light. I had my blinker turned on, ready to turn right and be on my way. I was in a hurry. And that's when I saw it.

There was a big rig coming from the left. He was zooming into town and I had to stop and wait on him to pass before I could continue on my way. But there was something unique about this rig.

He had a cross on the front of his grill. It was a cross outlined in lights. I just stared at it as he approached me. He got nearer and I took a look at that cross..........and I was immediately Comforted.

Comforted in knowing that my Lord and Savior loves me. Comforted in knowing that God is there for me. Comforted in knowing that He cares for me each and every day. Comforted in knowing that He has blessed me with a job that I love and with a husband and family that love me so much.

Just seeing that cross on that big rig made me relax. My tense shoulders fell back into my driver's seat. I let go of the steering wheel for a moment and forgot about the fact that I was in a hurry.

As the truck passed, a smile came across my face......and I said a silent prayer....."Lord, thank you for showing me 'that' tonight. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for the driver of that truck who is displaying his testimony wherever he drives each and every day."

And then, I drove home to the family that I love.

The Weekend

I got sick in in the middle of the night on Friday. I caught what turned out to be a 24hr virus. Nathan stayed away and he even took the kids to a birthday party on Saturday morning so they wouldn't be near my germs. Ryan already had a touch of it, so it was already too late for him.

Well, that little virus bug got a hold of Trent on Saturday evening and I felt so bad for him. He didn't know what was going on. He had never been sick like that before. Actually, he has....maybe once....but he was too little to remember. He felt so bad.

We had some company over on Saturday and I informed everyone before they came that I had been sick and Trent was too. However, everyone still came......maybe it was because Nathan was cooking a delicious meal of Japanese. Yep, he got a new griddle a few weeks ago and he can whip up some gooooood Japanese. He cooked steak, chicken, veggies (peppers, onions, zucchini), fried rice, and white sauce. Bridgett helped him out too. I finally got a little appetite back by Saturday night, and it was a yummy supper.

On Sunday, I planned to stay home with Trent and Ryan and keep our germs to ourselves instead of give them to everyone at church. Well, guess who woke up sick? Nathan. He has been sick all day and stayed in bed most of the time. I think he will feel better by Monday morning because this thing seems to only last one day. Natalee has been fortunate enough to stay well so far.

Since I stayed home today, I was able to do a lot of organizing. I'm still working on a bunch of piles all over the house. Remember my new motto? A place for everything and everything in its place!

Trent and I cleaned his entire room including the closet. I went through his toys and got rid of some. I went through some of his clothes that were too small and boxed them up for Ryan. I feel that I was actually productive. I've been thinking about doing a chore chart for the kids. I was inspired when I read a friends post here. So, Trent and I sat down and came up with his very own, simple Chore Chart. He helped with it and we talked about it. He knows exactly what to do each morning, afternoon, and night. It consists of 1. Get dressed 2. Brush teeth 3. Homework 4. Help with supper 5. Take a bath 6. Put on pajamas 7. Brush teeth 8. Clean up all toys.

I've added a few blogs to my list of "blogs I follow". If you are thinking about organizing, you should check out some of them. The Cowboy Phraseology girl has such a simple, beautiful style. She can accessorize really well and she has inspired me to clean up my unneeded, unwanted junk. My new favorite blog is IHeartOrganizing. She has decorated her home to be beautiful and functional. She has an awesome playroom that I would like to mimic in our upstairs room.

Check them out if you have a few minutes. You might even get inspired to do some organizing. Ya'll have a great week!

Photos of 2010

Click here to view this photo book larger

Piles

Piles here, piles there, piles everywhere!

While I was at home with Ryan for three months, I was able to do a whole lot of thinking. I realized that I needed to be a better mother, better wife, and better friend. In the past few weeks, I've began to realize that there are piles of stuff all over my house that distract me from being these things. These piles distract me from my joy, distract me from time with my family, and distract me from things I know God would have me to do. I feel that I need to make my house into a home. Until now, we have just lived here......now I want to "dwell". I want my home to feel more cozy and comfy.

So, we have started to de-clutter at the Griffin household. I took a few pictures this afternoon so that I will be able to see my "before meets after" and feel proud of myself.

I began by tackling my kitchen counters. As you enter my home from the garage, you walk into a small entryway which leads to the breakfast table and the entrance to the kitchen. Well, my arms are usually full of things such as keys, cell phone, mail, purse, diaper bag, my afternoon snack, sometimes a kid or two, etc. You name it and I've got it in my arms. So, once inside, I dump all of that stuff.....you guessed it - on the breakfast table and the kitchen counters.

These things never seem to find their place. And all of that clutter drives me crazy! I have to look at it everyday. There is a sign that was at Nathan's shop that says "A place for everything and everything in its place." This is my new motto. That kitchen counter and breakfast table have seen the last of their clutter. I'm making a place for all that stuff.

We made progress this weekend with one side of the counters. And you know what, I can't stop looking at them! They are so clean and clutter free and it feels so refreshing! Now, we are working on the side where all the mail usually gets dumped. I have a solution in mind and I will share it with you later.

Until then, I've got some more de-cluttering to do!

Randomness

Hello! I haven't forgotten about this blog, honest. We have been having lots of fun around the house these days. Here is some "randomness" that we've been up to since I last posted.....

Flag football for Trent....



Flag cheerleading for Natalee.....



He's a Patterson Eagle and she's a Pierce Co. Bear :-)



Sleeping for Ryan.....




Brothers watching the Homecoming Parade.....




Natalee riding with her team....





My 33rd Birthday......




Bedtime stories with my kids.......



Halloween! They were M&M's.......



More sleeping for Ryan.....




Group picture taken in Nana's yard......




Natalee's 7th birthday party!! Cake #1




Natalee's Cake #2 (We celebrated twice, one with friends and one with family)




Trent in his pilgrim outfit he made at school......




Ryan Jesse, finally awake......




and Laughing.......




I'm loving these days!

Ryan Jesse Griffin

Ryan was born on October 6, 2010 at 2:03 pm. He weighed 9 pounds, 1 ounce and was 21.25 inches long.